A combination of therapies can help – particularly energy management therapies and releasing foreign energies with oneself, healing past traumas through regression therapies, using hypnotherapy for placing suggestions to oneself and communication skills training that enables us to feel less helpless, be less stressed and more empowered about managing our motivation, getting others’ support or setting limits with people. In my practice as a therapist I have found these to be very useful. You may email to know more for treatment possibilities.

Is the person someone whom you have to interact with regularly even today? Are they abusive with you then your fear is relevant and you may need to work out self protection strategies, taking the help of organizations and people who are ready to help. You may need to know your legal rights and possibilities. Sometimes we need not take legal action but knowing about our rights can help us feel less fearful. Setting limits firmly not reactively helps and often surprises a bully. Getting strategic about staying away from the person at some times when they are in a bad mood, calling their bluff non-reactively can be useful sometimes –“Don’t try to intimidate me. Tell me what you want.” Sometimes it is about updating your map – as a child you were helpless and now as an adult you have many more options – reminding ourselves of this helps. Psychological perspective that the bully is stronger with braun but actually weaker with confidence and inner security than you are can help us feel less vulnerable. Regression therapy helps heal past traumas. Becoming more independent psychologically and financially and developing communication skills/ assertiveness skills through training can reduce fear and negativity because as we feel more empowered we fear the person less. We feel less negativity when we have overcome the negative effects remaining with us through self esteem building and confidence building. Setting limits is different from being negative to a person. Often in our effort to be positive about a person we think we cannot stop their unfair behaviours to us or else we are rejecting them. Saying ‘no’ or ‘stop’ is not negativity. We can say it without malice and as very relevant protection of ourselves. Negativity happens when we do not say the ‘no’, feel taken advantage of and then harbour revengeful feelings. Creative visualization can enable us to be more forward looking. We can know that success can happen from associating more with our visions and intentions rather than our past.

Only when we recognize that we do play our part in the downfalls and emotional suffering we face then can we come out. We may not be focusing enough on what we want and what is possible and feel sucked into feelings of doom and gloom and what is not working. With our lowered energy we do not do the small things we can do not realizing small things will become larger. We may not be willing to settle for a step by step pathway often trying to rush things beyond our possibility and go into loss. We may approach things reactively though one could see it as justified it is still what makes you make wrong choices and alienate support systems. We may be expecting things and people to be fully ‘good’ and give up at the first injustice instead of dealing with it carefully in all ways. Unfairness can be dealt with assertively or creatively or tactfully or a combination. We keep living in the loss and do not focus on where to put our energies. We may get into useless power struggles and battles instead of letting go maybe even with someone getting an advantage so that one can focus on real living. Our sufferings are real and yet we need to focus on what is working in our lives as well that is also as real and focus on what is possible for us to do, letting go what we do not find possible. Emotional suffering goes away as we follow the wisdom of the prayer “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.”

We need to keep a strong difference between having an inner feeling and inner negative thought and separate this from what we display and express. How we express our feelings and our outer behaviours can be considered as ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. So as long as you behave well you are ok. Learn to allow and accept your inner thoughts and feelings as they can sometimes be just uncontrolled, random and meaning nothing and to be ignored. On the other hand your negative thoughts and feelings can be expressing a genuine area of difficulty with that person that needs problem solving. Convert the negative thoughts and feelings you feel into understanding which behaviours of the other person you find difficult. This helps you to know you still love the person and are only angry about certain behaviours of theirs. Even though we do love a person some of the things they do or say may in actual fact be troubling us. So we need to sort it out with the person, set limits with them or have avoidance strategies to avoid being affected by those behaviours. And this can happen only when we allow ourselves to have negative feelings to a person. Counseling and therapies will help.

Many forms of healing exist and helping your brother to go in for these can reverse the depression and the weak organs. Medicines are one route and sometimes alternative healing therapies offer lot of hope along with nutritional management. The B & C vitamins are particularly known to be helpful. Alternative therapies focus on body (yoga, tai chi) or energy (pranic healing, reiki, hypnosis, EFT, spirit releasement) or thoughts and emotions (cognitive therapy, family therapy, NLP etc) and a combination of all can be powerful. Look at ans to Q5 above too.