WESAK 2008 - New Age Festival of Spiritual Unity and Blessings
Lectures, Teaching & Meditation On 17th,18th May 2008,9:30 am to 5:30 pm
venue: The auditoriam of the Indian Society of International Law, opposite the supreme Court 9, Bhagwan Dass Road, New Delhi.
Moon Light Meditation
19th May 2008, 6:30pm to 9:30pm Venue:97-A Eastern Avenue, Sainik Farm,New Delhi. For Reg:Poonam Sharma: 919313034752,Snigdha Nanda: 919818291375. More Detail>>
When we pursue happiness, it eludes you. However, when you recognise that happiness is the natural state of the soul, all you need is to eliminate all that comes between your happiness and you.
Rooshi
Kumar Pandya, a corporate workshop leader, believes that management is
not just about getting things done but also about compassion and personal
development
A rolling stone gathers no moss,' is an ancient adage parroted by parents,
teachers and wannabe well-wishers. "But is mossthat gooey growth of
stagnationreally desirable?" wondered a speculating youth. "A rolling
stone gathers no moss but it certainly gets polished," explained an out-of-the-ordinary
teacher, changing the course of this youth's life.
Today, a renowned
corporate trainer with a headful of silvery hair, Rooshi Kumar Pandya hasn't forgotten
the lessons of his early youth. "I was a stupid, hesitant, middle-class boy from
the western Indian state of Gujarat. If I had settled for that, today I would
have been a stupid, hesitant, middle-class teacher." Mossy indeed. But Pandya
decided to roll, and polished himself to a degree where he could take the world
in his stride without blinking an eye.
Nobody comes out of his workshop without being impressed. A clientele
that tends to look like a virtual who's who of the corporate world including
Indian bigwigs Godrej, Madras Refinery, Tisco, G.E. Shipping, and RBI,
to Coca Cola India, American Express and UB group of companies, as well
as assorted Indian celebrities such as Pandit Jasraj, Protima Bedi, Dr
Prakash Kothari and Shekhar Kapur, Pandya tackles tricky questions with
perfect ease and teaches various managerial skills with examples from
Indian epics Ramayana and Mahabharata with interesting anecdotes
thrown in.
"I came across
this big burly American in a plane who told me that he taught eschatology," says
Pandya and looks around. A roomful of white-collar executives keep mum. "Do you
know what eschatology is?" asks Pandya. No hands go up. "This is what I'm trying
to demonstrate. We don't ask questions, we are ashamed to say 'I don't know'."
"But what is eschatology?" asks a participantthe first step in changing
the preset behavior patterns. Pandya looks pleased. "You should ask. Eschatology
is the study of the after-death. The American used this word because he
had seen Indians pretending they knew what it meant, which gave him a
chance to ridicule them."
That's Pandya's version of assertiveness. "For people
like me who always equated aggressiveness with assertiveness," says Anand Arunachalam,
team leader with American Express, "the workshop changed the entire perspective.
For the first time I realized that assertiveness is not incompatible with politeness."
In fact, politeness is the very basis of assertiveness, claims Pandya:
"Assertive skills have to be developed keeping the cultural traits in mind. You
can afford to be blunt about your feelings in the USA. Not so in India. Here,
you can't tell your father that you don't like what he says so would he please
not interfere in your life." In other words, assertiveness is the ability to act
in harmony with your self-esteem without hurting others.
But how do
you say what you want to say without being blunt? "That's where communication
skills come into use," Pandya elaborates with his characteristic smile. Communication,
according to him, is one of the most popular courses in the corporate sector.
"They also want motivation and selling, but since communication plays an important
part in both, it ends up being the most important aspect of management."
Communication,
however, can be both verbal and nonverbal. "What would you do if a person
with shifty eyes, a slouching posture and nervous movements tells you
that he is extremely confident?" asks Pandya. "You'd either think he's
lying or you'd think there is something terribly wrong with his self-analytic
faculties." In effect, we tend to rely on nonverbal communication more.
No wonder actions speak louder than words.
"As part of the workshop, I conduct self-image exercises where
participants write down how they perceive themselves, their strengths and weaknesses.
The idea is to find out the fallacies in people's self-image," explains Pandya.
For example, a person who believes that he can never speak up might
discover that it is his self-image, which hinders his authority. "This can help
them feel better about themselves and be more assertive. I also hold dialogues
between the participants so that they understand the knowable aspects of communication.
There is also a role playing exercise where each participant acts out personality
types."
But at a time when New Age corporate gurus are sprouting by
the dozen, what makes Pandya different? "My initial reaction to him," says M.M.
Bhatt, addl. general manager of Gujarat Narmada Valley Fertilizers, India, "was
cautious since I had attended a couple of corporate workshops and found them rather
ineffective." But his first interaction with Pandya changed his mind.
ASSERTIVENESS
QUESTIONNAIRE
1.
Do you feel that you must buy something if a salesperson goes to great lengths
showing you things? 2. Do you have difficulty starting a conversation with
a stranger? 3. Do you find it difficult to criticize a friend? 4. Do
you feel self-conscious when somebody compliments you? 5. Do you feel exploited
and pushed around? 6. Do you find it difficult to ask a queue breaker to
join the queue? 7. Do you get 'I should have said that' kind of thoughts
after meeting people? 8. Do you have difficulty saying 'no' to a friend?
9. Do you think people find you boring? 10. Do you have trouble asking
for an overdue increment? 11. Do you feel uncomfortable when you are being
watched at work? 12. Do you find silence at social gatherings uncomfortable?
13. Are you afraid to make mistakes? 14. Are you always defensive when
you are criticized? 15. Do you feel dissatisfied with your vocation?
16. Do you pretend that you know or understand a topic even if you don't?
If your answer is yes to four or more questions, you need to learn assertiveness
"Being in charge of personnel, my job requires handling of sensitive matters.
The workshop taught me how to retain inner calm even during moments of
tension," says Bhatt.
The
sentiment is echoed by D. Sivanandhan, Joint Commissioner of Police, Crime
Branch, who attended Pandya's stress-relief workshop when he conducted
it for the Mumbai Police. "Our profession is extremely stress-prone. But
after doing some stretch exercises that he recommended, I feel fit for
the whole day," says he.
The most noticeable change, however, was reported by P.N. Venugopal, president
of the life sciences division, UB group of companies, who has attended
four of Pandya's workshops. "It helped me realize all my dreams," says
Venugopal, "I tried his self-hypnosis to secure a foreign job. In a couple
of years I had a Singapore-based job, a terraced house and even a car
matching the color I wanted."
For Pandya, the road to success began with a public speaking competition
whose winner was to be sent to the USA for a year. Pandya, then a teacher
of Sanskrit and music, decided to participate. As luck would have it,
he was selected. "When I told this to an English-speaking friend," recalls
Pandya, "he guffawed and said: 'Rooshi, you can't speak English, you don't
take liquor or eat meat, you've no table manners, what will you do in
the USA?' But he finally took pity on my condition and taught me some
basic English sentences."
So Pandya set off, lock, stock and barrel, to big bad USA. Awed by the
sight of plastic cups (they hadn't arrived in India then), he collected
them as souvenirs. "Those were the most exciting, learning and horrifying
experiences of my life. I was struggling to come to terms with the language,
the culture, the food. The Americans were friendly. But when they would
ask me why Indians don't kill and eat the millions of cows crowding Indian
roads, I would only smile in return. Only two kinds of people reply with
a smile: idiots, for they know nothing, and sages, because they know everything."
Initially, Pandya thought that he was being bullied because he came from
a developing country. But later, he realized that this was also happening
to American students who would go to developing countries like Mexico
and Brazil as Peace Corps Volunteers. Dr Manuel Smith, who was then heading
the team of psychiatrists in the Peace Corps, realized that these students
required a different kind of training. They devised a training based on
psychology and behavioral skills. Pandya, the course professor, felt that
it would be useful if he could bring the system to India. "So, about 12
years back, I put this course together and started teaching it here,"
says Pandya.
There were the usual hurdles. The Indian business community hadn't yet
woken up to the globalized economy and didn't understand the need for
corporate management. "I had to literally start from scratch, go to corporate
houses, and explain what I intended to do," recalls Pandya. That was in
1973. Today, Pandya still feels that Indians need his workshops more than
anybody else.
"As
a culture, Indians tend to be defensive since we have been invaded so
many times. The increasing globalization makes it imperative that Indian
corporate houses learn better interpersonal skills. Otherwise, they go
out and gawk at things since at the back of their minds they still have
a slavish mentality," says Pandya.
"Corporate management is more relevant today since we are facing higher
levels of stress due to the opening up of our economy," says Bhatt. The
rules of the game are fast changing and so is the corporate structure.
Gujarat Narmada Valley Fertilizers has sent over 150 odd employees to
attend Pandya's workshops. With an elaborate system of sponsoring employees
for self-development courses and regular in-house training programs, they
seem all set to meet the challenges of a New Age corporate policy. American
Express also holds regular workshops and makes it mandatory for new recruits
to undergo a week-long leadership training program. Timex sends its senior
managers every year to attend personal growth workshops.
"The Indian corporate world is beginning to realize that human resource
is more important than money," says Krishan Khanna, of Indo-Asian Business
Group, Mumbai. He feels that the future belongs to teams, which is why
HRD is the most important aspect of management.
Jitendra Kumar Dhaka of Timex, who had always been a shy person, feels
that Pandya changed him: "I head a workforce of about 300 people. Pandya's
workshop taught me how to handle them without hurting sentiments."
"When I came to India initially," recalls Pandya, "the most popular workshop
was interpersonal communication. Now it is stress management (see box).
Not surprising in a globalized economy where the top management is always
under pressure." Pandya also teaches goal setting and conducts workshops
on presentation skills.
A lucid speaker, an accomplished sitarist and a master hypnotist, Pandya
is a man with many talents. A disciple of Indian classical music maestros
Ustad Ali Akbar Khan and Annapurna Devi (sitar maestro Pandit
Ravi Shankar's first wife whom Pandya later married), he believes
that humaneness is the key to interpersonal relations. "Corporate management
is not just about how to get your way but also about respecting others,
feeling concern for their well-being and being a complete person," says
Pandya. Which gives a distinct touch to his version of management. "I
feel that his workshops are aimed at developing a positive attitude,"
says Prakash Jha, general manager at K. Raheja Builders, Mumbai. Prabha
Narayan, from the HRD department of Hindustan Petroleum, joins in. "I
feel that his workshop has introduced me to myself once again."
So how different is his concept of management from personal growth?
"It could be the same," says Pandya. "Good managerial skills make a good
man. It is about compassion, empathy..." he hesitates, and then brightens
up, "Yes, perhaps you could call it my idea of spirituality." From boardroom
to the psyche, Pandya covers it all with a large sweep of his hand. A
corporate trainer who could easily pass for a musician, he represents
the quintessential element of integrated management whose focus is man
taken in totality.
With inputs from Rupali Patil
MANAGE
STRESS
Develop...
a personal stress profile by listing things that cause you stress:
occupational, social, cultural and physical.
some hobbies and spend time with friends and family.
a positive and healthy self-image be aware of your strengths and
weaknesses and look upon your mistakes as tools for learning.
an alternative reaction to stress-causing agents by being aware of
them.
Cultivate...
a sense of humor.
An observer within yourself who is aware of your motives, strengths
and weaknesses, and listen to its feedback.
Avoid...
perceiving every task as a challenge.
leaving several tasks uncompleted.
aggression and hostility by learning to be assertive.
Learn...
to share your problems with somebody who is caring and nonjudgmental.
to compartmentalize and avoid taking your problems home.
To be kind to yourself.
To manage your time. Start the day leisurely, instead of rushing.