Devotion and mindfulness

Devotion and mindfulness

Practising awareness is the greatest  spiritual practice that can be followed by  a seeker, says Shivi Verma 

Even though I am capable of  making rational decisions, deep  down, I am an emotional person. 

I reached my spiritual goals  galloping on the horses of  intensely strong emotions. And I  enjoyed the ride because it lead  me to the intoxicating nectar of  romancing the Divine. The highs  of gaining proximity, mixed with  the lows of feeling separation  from God, used to be my manna.  I survived on these yo-yoing  emotions and felt that I was  the chosen one for getting the  exclusive feeling of being in love  with the Divine. 

But, later, I realised that even  though desirable, it was neither  the highest path nor the greatest  experience of spirituality. It  was a form of deep attachment,  that blinded you to other  

realities of life. It took away  objectivity, impartiality, and  clarity of thought. Bhaava is  

bliss which gladdens your heart  and makes you feel whole and  complete, yet, if not mixed with  the right amount of awareness,  can create havoc in life.  

Something which is so evident  in the outside world. People get  emotionally attached to their  form of worship or God, making  it very easy for disruptive forces  to provoke them to violence  and arson. Gripped by even the  

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purest and highest of emotions,  you can still be entrapped by  maya and act irrationally. 

Recently my colleagues gifted  me the picture of my guru as  a pleasant surprise gift for  Christmas. I was beside myself  with joy. It was the best gift I  could ever have received from  anyone. I gave it pride of place  on my table and left for some  urgent work. Upon returning,  I saw that my peon had  

unknowingly put my bag on top  of it, flattening the image in the  process. I felt infuriated to see  this desecration of my guru’s  

picture. As though the sanctity  of my feelings for him was  violated. I patiently pulled up the  bag and kept it aside. No sooner  had I done it than my peon  returned and in a bid to impress  me with his eagerness to serve,  placed the bag on the picture of  my guru again. He could not see  the image since its front did not  face him. A dagger went through  my heart. I was about to scream  at him for his foolishness when  the cold hand of awareness  stopped me. I thought, “What  would actually please my guru?  Protecting his picture or not  hurting an innocent man?” I  realised it was the latter. With  great self-control, I told him  that it was my guru’s picture he  

was putting the bag on. He was  contrite and begged profusely  for forgiveness. I smiled and let  him go. 

I passed the litmus test placed  by destiny before me. But I also  realised that it wasn’t easy  and required a great deal of  awareness from me. Something  I wouldn’t have been able to do  had I not been into spirituality.  I realised the perils of blind  devotion that day, which causes  people to hurt others simply  because a sacred emotion  was violated. Truly, there is  no spiritual practice greater  than awareness. Since it does  not have the juice of emotion,  it may not be preferred by  many seekers, but it is capable  of leading you to the ultimate  emotion of having led a life free  of the guilt of hurting others.  Awareness tells you when to  indulge in your emotions and  when not to. When to work  and when to relax. If you can  master it, you have virtually  mastered your life.  

Editor of Life Positive, Shivi  Verma is a devotee who  found all her answers in loving God passionately.