Growing through joy

Growing through joy

Must we grow only through pain or is it possible to grow even through good times, asks Suma Varughese

One of the daily sentences  I share with my writing  group, Zen Pens, referred  to our tendency to only grow  through pain. I concluded by  saying that if we want this to  change we must be willing to grow  through joy as much as we do  through pain. One of the women  in the group asked what growing  through joy would entail. That  got me thinking. 

What we do not recognise is that  in just the same way that pain  can give rise to joy when we use  it well, joy carries with it the  seeds of future pain unless we  exercise tremendous vigilance.  When we are in a state of comfort  and ease, and life is going well  for us, we have a tendency to slip  into complacency. We begin to  take credit for this state of affairs  and thus aggrandise our ego.  The growth of the ego will often  create an increase in arrogance  and a magnified idea of our  capabilities. We also forget that  this too will pass, and therefore  forget to stay alert.  

For instance, if we have been  experiencing prosperity of late,  we tend to forget that it could  leave us just the way it came to  us. Because of that we begin to  cultivate expensive habits. From  commuting by public transport  

we hanker after our own vehicle.  We begin to travel on leisure  more often, and buy a lot more  food stuff, electronic gizmos,  clothes, and household artefacts  than we actually need. I don’t  say we should adopt an austere  regimen, but neither should we  get imprisoned in a lifestyle that  we may not always be able to  afford. Or if we do, we must make  sure that when the time comes to  drop the lifestyle, we will do so  without a moment’s hesitation.  That would be growing through  joy. 

One of the best examples we have  of this state is of Emperor Janaka,  Sita’s father. He was a legendary  king, with armies at his behest,  gold and jewellery in his coffers,  and every other blessing that life  could offer him. Through it all,  King Janaka remained as vigilant  as an eagle, completely focused  on being in the moment, and not  getting pulled into the veils of  Maya. Because of this, neither  power, pelf, nor prosperity had  the capacity to corrupt him.  When he was asked by a visitor  how he managed to stay above  temptations among the dancing  girls and the banquet hall of his  palace, King Janaka asked him to  take a round of his palace, while  balancing a glass of milk on his  head. When the man returned,  

shaken by the difficulty of the  task, King Janaka asked him if he  had thought of the dancing girls  or the food any time during his  round. “How could I?” exclaimed  the visitor. “It was all I could do  to balance the glass of milk on  my head.” “Now you know my  secret,” said the king. “My only  focus is on being in the moment.  There is no space for dancing  girls or anything else.” 

Staying alert, staying aware,  is the only way we can grow  through joy or good times. This  is never easy. The reason why it  is so much easier to grow through  pain is because pain is a powerful  awakener. The suffering is so  immense that we will do anything  to get out of its grip, and that is  how most of us get a glimpse of  who we are. 

But perhaps as humanity evolves,  more and more of us may move  into enlightenment as a natural  process of maturity, and awaken  to our real selves without the need  for pain or suffering. Meanwhile,  let’s keep working on ourselves! 

Suma Varughese is a thinker,  writer, and former Editor-inChief of Life Positive. She also holds writer’s workshops. Write  

to her at sumavarughese@hotmail.com. 

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