By Shivi Verma
The more focussed you are on being peaceful inside, the more chances there are of it being reflected outside, says Shivi Verma
I am quite active on social media. And even though I feel that it is pointless to get embroiled in heated arguments and waste precious time, I often end up sharing my views on controversial issues hogging the national headlines. Mostly, I try to be patient but give in to my urge to voice my opinion when I observe that majority views are vitriolically tilted in a particular direction. My purpose is never to say that those with a particular view are wrong, but just that they should consider the other side of the picture as well.
Our lack of love or intense judgmentalism is nowhere more apparent than on social media. Bile, abuse and insults fly thick and fast among netizens, and the virtual world resembles an arena where scores are settled and historical wrongs are put right. At the same time, I am also amazed at the cruelty with which people attack those who are simply sharing their hurts and wounds on these platforms. Sometimes, I would argue in their favour but would mostly give up in the middle, seeing the futility of this exercise. Nobody was ready to understand the other’s viewpoint. I used to get appalled by the quantum of online hate and scorn and used to wonder if it was possible to heal such a badly divided world.
Then one day I happened to attend a workshop on emotional healing. And without being cognitively aware my own deep-seated beliefs about patriarchy came to the fore.
Till that time I had never felt that I had biases. To me they felt as trenchant assessment of the current scenario. But when I realised that they were negatively affecting my reality, I decided to heal them. Memories after memories came flooding by and I was forced to look them in the eye.
I took the next day off and decided to complete the process which had started in the workshop. I cleansed my mind, I meditated, I forgave and even wept for sometime. And then I found myself touching a deep space of love within. A love which understood that either nobody was a victim or everyone was. And from this standpoint all my incredulity and bewilderment at the inexplicable reaction of humans to contrarian views was nullified. I was no longer gripped with notions about the male gender. I could view them in their full beauty, as an expression of the Divine masculine.
Around the same time I saw a Facebook post on which netizens were pouring relentless misogynistic hate and abuse. This time, without losing my sang-froid, I was able to put across the other side of the story. And since I was coming from deep love, I had space for counter-attacks and explosive reactions of those who disagreed with me. Gradually and lovingly, without calling anybody names, I was able to clearly explain my perspective and win over each of my detractors. I realised the power of unconditional love and deep empathy on that day. But it isn’t that I have made it a mission to prove a point to everyone.
I realise that not everything out there needs my intervention. Infact, the outer world is designed for dualistic expression. And no amount of effort to broker peace between warring ideologies was going to mend the situation. That day the gap between me and the world expanded a bit more. I realised that the more I stayed in the calm, centred, blissful world pulsating within me, the more chances I had to affect the outer world positively. I don’t need to prove anything by way of arguments. Since I am the world.
Says my guru:
“Peace within me is peace within you
Peace within you is peace within many.
Peace within many is peace in the nature.
Peace in the nature is peace in the world.”
Editor of Life Positive, Shivi Verma is a devotee who found all her answers in loving God passionately.
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