Detaching from attachment
July 2023
July 2023
Shivi Verma affirms what the scriptures have been telling us: vairagya, (detachment) is the boat which will slowly but surely take us across the ocean of samsara (cycle of birth and rebirth)
One of the hardest things to give up on the spiritual path is attachment. We may meditate; do selfless service; be mindful of our thoughts, speech, and actions; do copious amounts of healing and inner work; and yet, the litmus test of our spiritual growth comes in the form of giving up our attachment to possessions, situations, or people we are so deeply linked too.
And attachment is like a spider. Secretly and unannounced, it creeps stealthily into the recesses of our minds and weaves a permanent web there. Unconsciously, we get attached to things we consider our own. Be it our children, spouses, position, money, belongings, beliefs, or body. Should a belonging go missing, look how it sends us into a tailspin! We panic and feel that we have lost a vital part of ourselves which was essential to our sense of completeness. The circumference of possessiveness just goes on increasing as we amass more and more worldly objects.
I particularly get attached to my belongings. Even losing an ear stud can cause me immense anguish,
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and I become restless until I have found it. However, the Divine is kind. It often helps me lose things permanently only to loosen up my sense of attachment to them. A wise seeker, understanding the shackles created by their attachment to things, learns to distance themself emotionally and mentally from their belongings. Some even shun material possessions knowing how they can come in the path of liberation.
However, the tentacles of attachment can act subtly to entrap you. Those who have overcome their attachment to material possessions or filial relations can still be faced with attachment to their beliefs, ideas, or their sense of righteousness. Holding on to anything, whether material or intangible, can send a soul back into the spiral of bondage to the earthly incarnation. Associating very deeply with anything is the propensity of the ego—that aspect which strongly works towards maintaining the individual identity. It thrives on attachment, possessiveness, and self-gratification. The more it receives, the stronger it becomes, and the more that is taken away from it, the weaker it gets.
The wise, like King Janaka, keep themselves reminded of the
transience of life and the fragility of the ego to stay above the pulls and pushes of life. Be it abstract beliefs or tangible objects. While it is relatively easy to detach from physical things, the next hardest thing to do is to cut cords with emotional attachment and beliefs we hold so dearly to our hearts. When faced with scenarios, such as the loss of a loved one or a cherished relationship, I remind myself that the world is a stage and we are all actors trying to evolve each other. While arguing with someone, I often try to see the situation from the other’s point of view and accept it if I find it to be convincing. But the best way is to keep thanking God at each moment of your life and to keep remembering that everything belongs to Him and goes back to Him and that love is the final, eventual, and all-pervasive reality of life, superseding everything.
When we have lived completely, yet with a sense of detachment, we will no longer be pulled back to earth to finish incomplete learnings and experiences.
Editor of Life Positive, Shivi
Verma is a devotee who found
all her answers in loving God
passionately.
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