By Jamuna Rangachari
Hatred and fear seems to be something that is extremely prevalent today. We either wish to condemn or attribute the situation we are in today by bashing or blaming some.
Hatred and fear are common even about our relationships with doctors, especially those with a chronic ailment like multiple sclerosis, that has a lot of research and attempts going on.
In my case, I have improved radically due to acupuncture and my relationship with my doctor(s).
When my neurologist told me I had an ailment for which no cure had been discovered yet, I was of course depressed but that did not mean I felt it was his fault. He was of course doing his best to make me feel comfortable and well looked after. We became good friends and I am in touch with him regularly.
After a period of time when I tried various alternate therapies which did not show much results for me, I discovered and radically improved due to acupuncture.
When I suggested this to a friend, who is also an MS patient, she said she absolutely hated any therapy. When I asked my friend why hated it without knowing much about it, she replied ”It’s not hatred, it’s fear. I hate all the doctors, whichever therapy they may be practising. In fact, I hate even my neurologist.”
She was so bitter that I just could not get through to her. Well, this was a very sad situation and I just could not speak to her. Her fear was palpable and she seemed to have actually given up on life. There are many people like her today. By becoming more knowledgeable about what all can happen, they forget to look for solutions but just read more and more about the problem they are facing.
The fact is, if people start fearing physicians then this is a real problem. Trust has always been the basis of the doctor-patient relationship. If we cannot trust doctors then the relationship becomes adversarial: If we cannot trust doctors, we will not tell them what they need to know. Naturally, we cannot really improve as they will not know what they are treating. And vice versa, as the doctor will become more guarded with us. The doctor will stop being totally open with us because he/she will not be sure about what our reaction with be.
Actually, if we think of it, the doctor-patient relationship has to be one of the most open relationships. Once the patient and physician are brought together, they enter a relationship based on the expectations each holds for the conduct of the other. The relationship thus formed has substantial implications for how the curing and caring process will be accomplished and the extent to which needs and expectations will be met, satisfaction achieved, and health restored.
We have to understand that each of this is extremely important and we must follow it to the best possible extent. For this, hatred and fear must be just thrown out.
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