Accessing the lover within
The Divine can guide you as well as give you the courage and tenacity to surmount the conditioned and selfish demands of society, says Shivi Verma
We celebrate love in the month of February and weave rosy dreams about being in love and finding our ‘happily ever after’ with the one who is meant to be ours forever.
However, the more I mature and observe life, I realise that there is no greater love available to human beings than their own higher Self.
People, especially women, have been taught so many self-sabotaging beliefs that they end up becoming their own worst enemies as well as of those they profess to love.
We have been brought up on tales of loyal wives who battled even Yamraj (the god of death) to get the life of their husband back or sacrificed all that they had to protect their family’s name and reputation. These axioms have made women believe that their own happiness and well-being comes second to that of their parents, husband, or in-laws. Even the most educated and successful have trouble casting away these beliefs which insult them as sovereign human beings with rights and self-respect.
However, spirituality has a way of reinstilling the right values and shaking off archaic customs and conditioning from the mind.
Recently, I came across a young, single mother who was compelled to leave her husband’s house due to prolonged neglect and abuse. Shaken and disturbed, she was baffled about the next step to take in life and was unable to see through the maze of conflicting thoughts and crippling fears.
I asked if she was willing to sit for meditation with me, half expecting her to decline it. Surprisingly, she agreed. We both did guided meditation for half an hour after which I saw peace and happiness descend upon her. She began meditating regularly and even signed up for a spiritual mentorship programme. The resultant positive changes in her personality were too conspicuous to ignore, as though she knew that the Universe had her back and she was in safe hands.
I got irrefutable proof of her awakened inner strength when she was able to thwart and vehemently resist attempts by close relatives to convince her against filing for a divorce for the sake of the family’s reputation. She rose like a fierce warrior and battled all emotional blackmail and manipulation single-handedly. She even threatened to call the police if they did not leave her house. When I met her the next day, she narrated the whole incident to me with eyes that blazed fire. I was impressed to see her determination to overcome any societal pressure which crippled her new-found strength and confidence and pushed her back in the dungeon of sorrow, despair, and helplessness.
It was a clear testimony to a woman’s inner strength which erupts like a volcano when she finds her truth, even if she has been manipulated for years by an unscrupulous society into not believing her instincts. She glowed from an inner knowing that her life and happiness lay in her own hands and she needed to make her own decisions rather than let others decide for her, if she wanted to secure her daughter’s future.
It was amazing to see her being led by her inner guide, her higher Self, and her real true love, which clearly told her that it was her right to be free and happy, and not be in an abusive relationship for the sake of society. Who knows, a new and real love might tip-toe into her life after she has walked the difficult but rewarding path of self-love and self-discovery.
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