From darkness to light
We are our strengths and not our weaknesses, points out Suma Varughese, so that is what we need to identify with
One of my biggest gurus on the path has been my unduly sensitive stomach. Each time it goes out of kilter, it is usually some insight or realisation that enables me to swim back to normalcy.
My digestion had been yo yoing for the last few days. Yesterday, exasperated by the discomfort and my own fearful focus on the situation, I told myself that I was spirit and not matter, and therefore matter had no option but to follow the path of spirit. As spirit, or God stuff, I was perfect health, pure potential, absolute strength, commitment, and will. Whereas ill health was nothing but the weak reflection of my fears, resistance, blocks, experiences, and received wisdom. So why on earth was I focussing on ill-health?
That diatribe helped considerably, and today I woke up feeling much better. What’s more, that whole line of thought got powerfully reinforced by a rather mundane task. I picked up the phone to order a kilo of onions from the grocer but got sidetracked momentarily by some WhatsApp messages. I berated myself for my lack of focus but soon came back with a powerful argument. As spirit,
I was perfect focus, so I did not need to pull myself up.
It hit me powerfully that all this while, I have been identifying with my weaknesses, simply because I could not accept them. So I resisted them, beat myself up for
them, and struggled to go past them while distrusting my capacity to do so. But my essence was wholeness, perfection, and completion. I was everything that was positive. I was confidence and perfect presence. I was peace and ease. I was energy and dynamism. Strength and power. Intention and energy.
What a pity, therefore, that instead of identifying with these beautiful qualities, I was allowing my focus on my debilities and disabilities to drain away my confidence, joy, and positivity. The moment this thought entered my head, I was filled with tremendous energy and dynamism. If I was all these qualities, I never had to distrust myself, never had to engage in long conversations in my head with the inner critic. Indeed, this realisation, more or less, deprived the inner critic of a job. I could rest easy in my space, absolutely free of inner conflict. The inner warfare would well and truly end. The Kurukshetra would be no more. I recognise that merely
thinking these thoughts will not actually bring us to the space of inner power. But such insights will attune us more and more to what we should focus on—our true nature, our strengths. It is human nature to focus on what we lack and never focus on what we have. It is human nature to resist what we dislike in ourselves instead of celebrating what we like in ourselves. It is human nature to engage in battle with our shadow self. But that is all it is—a shadow.
The more we endorse and embrace our strengths, the less we pay attention to our weaknesses. Ketan Shah, Life Positive’s beloved acupressure guru, offers a lovely prayer at his workshop. “Oh Lord, strengthen my strengths, and weaken my weakness.” I could not have said it better, myself.
Suma Varughese is a thinker, writer, and former Editor-in-Chief of Life Positive. She also holds
writer’s workshops. Write to her at sumavarughese@
hotmail.com.