Being a retired person, Sujatha Rao
shares some valuable lessons she has
learnt along the way for enjoying the
evening of one’s life
Retirement is one of the most important milestones in our lives. More so now, with working
hours getting longer, targets getting steeper, and the economy becoming more and more uncertain in an interconnected world where layoffs and job hops are so very common. Hence, stress is something everyone has to fight with when one is at work, irrespective of the nature of one’s job.
Many people hang up their boots much before their actual retirement day. They aspire to opt for early retirement and get into things they always wanted to do. So, when I retired from a full-time career, I was the cynosure of the eyes of youngsters rather than my peer group. Their common refrain was “You are so lucky, Ma’am. I wish I were in your place.”
“Oh my God! Isn’t it odd that you are wishing to be in the shoes of someone so old, at your age?” I would quip in reply with a chuckle, while inwardly telling myself that I don’t blame them. After all, did I not spend the final few years crossing the months off the calendar? Wasn’t it true that this activity gave me greater pleasure than the salary that would get credited into my account every month?
Having said that, if one assumes that work is devoid of any pleasure, one would be gravely mistaken. In addition to granting us financial independence and giving us an opportunity to make lifetime friends, it adds so much value to our life in terms of learning. It is just that the innumerable variables involving work, such as the mismatch between what we want and what we get, the daily commute, the difficult bosses, the unpredictable economic environment around us, etc. make it much more complicated, and this often leads to the stress we undergo. A career, being a marathon of multiple decades and not a sprint of a couple of years, also demands a lot of patience, grit, resilience, and perseverance from each of us.
Having been into my retired life for half a decade now, I feel the following ten important commandments would help us in reaching the milestone with greater success and equanimity. In retrospect, I realise that I missed out on a couple of these, but I am glad that I was on target for most of them.
1. Thou shall start saving early
“I will start saving later. Let me enjoy the hard earned freedom of spending over things I had craved for all my life,” said Nitin as he ran his hands lovingly over his motorbike that made a 15-lakh-rupee hole in his savings.
There is some justification for what Nitin feels. After all, isn’t youth all about a period free from worries of responsibility? What is the harm if one splurges over one’s desires after having waited to do so for so long? Well, nothing. As long as one puts a limit on such spending, because everything is a trade-off in life. If we don’t start saving early, we would be losing the opportunity to reap the benefits of compounding, and as Einstein once said, noting
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Saving early in life is a virtue
that compounding happens to be the eighth wonder of the world, “He who understands it, earns it; he who doesn’t, pays for it.”
2. Thou shall not borrow beyond your repayment capacity
“I went in for a big loan. But then, isn’t an EMI (equated monthly installment) as good as savings?” Ashok quipped jocularly. Not only did Ashok take a massive loan for his house, but he also spent a lot of his savings on furnishing it with very expensive items. After all, it was a house where he and his family would live a lifetime, he justified.
An EMI is touted as good savings while paying rent is said to be an avoidable expenditure. While there is some truth in this, going beyond
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your repayment capacity will land you in deep trouble. We all know what happened during the subprime crisis.
Secondly, in a scenario where almost all the kids leave once they grow up chasing their own futures, leaving an empty nest behind, it’s time parents think multiple times before spending huge amounts on big houses.
3. Thou shall cover yourself and your family adequately
India is one of the most under-insured countries in the world. In the absence of social security measures like those in the developed nations, the situation behoves us to go in for more insurance than what is required for us and our family, more so if one is the sole breadwinner. As we progress towards our retirement, our focus should shift towards covering ourselves and our spouses with adequate health insurance.
4. Thou shall prioritise your health over everything else
In a career spanning more than three decades, Suraj was used to putting in crazy hours at work. As he focussed on his growth on the corporate ladder, he acted as though nothing else mattered. Whenever someone close to him told him to slow down, he would say, “I will totally relax once I hang up my boots.” However, when that day finally arrived, he had to get busy running around hospitals as he had contracted all the major lifestyle diseases, such as hypertension, diabetes, and cardiac issues.
With the pandemic having shown all of us the importance of health, it’s time we gave top priority to taking care of our physical, mental, and spiritual health right from our youthful days as all is lost if health is lost.
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5. Thou shall put ‘Family and friends time’ on your calendar
Focused on providing well for the family, Revanth spent all his time growing his business. He had no time for vacations, he told himself. For him, time meant money, and he didn’t want to waste time spending it on friends or family. “All that after I retire,” he would tell his wife whenever she complained about his lack of time for the family. With many an ailment that renders him almost immobile, he has all the time in the world now for regrets during his retirement.
While money is important, equally important are the relationships we build over our lifetime. It takes painstaking efforts to build a comfortable web of family and friends around us, which is extremely important both for our physical and mental health.
6. Thou shall have fun
You shall budget for your kind of fun while you are still working. Many people want to put travel on their bucket lists. Postponing all the travel to the retirement days is not prudent as not all would have the requisite energy levels as they age. Travelling with family members when one is young ensures solidifying of familial ties and creates fond memories.
Life is all about experiential flavours, and travel is one of the best flavours there is in this regard. It also makes one humble by making one realise that whether you are rich or poor, young or old, big or small, the basic things that make human beings human are the same across the world.
7. Thou shall engage yourself in purposeful action
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Its important to have fun alonside work
“I want my parents to be constructively engaged. I don’t know how to get them to do that, and I feel guilty about not spending enough time with them,” Srija lamented as she works full time in a very demanding profession.
In a digitalised world, it is extremely important that you pay serious attention to your passions, hobbies, and spiritual pursuits during your youthful days so that you can fall back on them without constantly hankering after external sources to keep you engaged, because doing so
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may result in resentment from all quarters.
8. Thou shall learn to forgive and forget with an attitude of gratitude
They say that as we age, we become wise. Wisdom is about forgiveness and also conscious forgetfulness while embracing an attitude of gratitude. It’s time we forgive and try to forget the words uttered in the heat of the moment in
youthful arrogance by our near and dear people. After all, we have only one life to be lived; so let’s not spend our last few years on this earth all alone in the name of keeping our scores even because of the past baggage that we carry.
9. Thou shall monetise assets close to your retirement
Many a time, people take pride in the number of physical assets they own: multiple houses, luxury cars, diamond sets, etc. However, close to retirement, it makes ample sense to monetise some of these assets, especially if your children are NRIs well-settled in countries across the globe. And if possible, give back to the less privileged generously.
10. Thou shall draw a will
We keep postponing one of the most important aspects of retired life, which is to write a will so that the transfer of assets happens smoothly after we leave this world. Our society is replete with stories of families fighting over property mainly because there were no wills left behind by elderly people about the inherited ancestral property. Be kind to yourself before you plan a bequest. We need to make it easy to pass on by leaving instructions about everything— even the funeral arrangements and gratuitous donations.
Jane Fonda, an American actress, activist, and former fashion model, in her popular TED talk, talked about our increasing life spans in the present day enabling us to live long and fulfil “third acts.” Hence, it is all the more important that we plan well in advance for this “third act” during our retirement days so as to make it really “fruitful” for one and all.
Sujatha Rao is a retired banker. She has been contributing articles to various newspapers and mag azines over the last two decades. Two of her short stories were placed third in Times of India’s national level Write India contest (Seasons 1 and 2). Her first book titled In the Company of Stories was published recently. Her other interests include reading, traveling, practising yoga, and mindfulness.
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