We all are the result of maya,
which makes us undergo a
journey, only to realise that there
never was one, says Ajay Kalra
We are all on a journey. The journey to realise who we are. Most personal journeys are
about finding ourself. This journey is about losing all ideas about ourself. It’s an uncommon journey which few people undertake.
The other thing unusual about this journey is that people undertaking it are imagined. It may seem that a person is undertaking a journey over a period of time, but, in actuality, nothing ever happens. Like a dream seems real until waking up, similarly, this journey seems real until the end is reached, only to realise that the character and journey never happened.
This is the peculiarity of this journey. And these are the different stages of this mysterious journey:
1. Unconsciousness
This is where the journey begins—in darkness. We suddenly come into this unfamiliar world. We try hard to fit in. If we can’t, we rebel. The mind is a jumble of thoughts. We are not aware of these thoughts. Just as a ring is stuck on a finger, we are stuck in our thoughts. We believe every thought. We are what the thoughts say about us. Because we are fused with thoughts. Some of these thoughts are about who we want to be, some of them are about who we are, and others explain why we are not what we want to be.
This is a confusing period. We are easily influ enced by thoughts, not just our own but also those of others. We are not clear about who we are or who we should be. We are simply pro pelled by the force of what others tell us, how others are living, and how others want us to be.
We may believe we know what we want, but that is the illusion of thought. What we know is mostly what we have heard and read. Most humans start their journey in this stage and end their journey here. They believe they know who they are, not realising that what they know is just a belief.
2. Consciousness
A minority move to the next stage of the journey. Most who venture into this stage have a quest to look deeply into Existence. They search for something unknown because what they know is not fulfilling. Or because that is how it is meant to be.
These people enter the world of self-discov ery, self-healing, and Self-realisation. For the first time, thoughts are examined. For the first time, thoughts are watched. And for the first time, there is space between the person and his thoughts.
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Suddenly, there is a realisation that a radio is playing. It seems to be blaring thoughts con stantly. And this radio is within us. Until now, we never heard this radio, even though it was go ing on in us all the time. As we watch thoughts, some of us get lucky.
We glimpse a mind free of thoughts. No mind. It is the most beautiful experience we have ever had. It is divine. It is heavenly. It is blissful. But it does not last. It goes away. The clouds of thoughts come back. The vast blue sky of silence is gone. The radio is back.
Now begins the expedition to stop thoughts. We want no mind. Freedom from thoughts. Now we become serious seekers. We meditate, chant, heal, regress, affirm, undergo therapies, and do all kinds of practices to become a better version of ourself. And we do.
But we do not experience Silence because we are always in a state of becoming. And becom ing is never-ending. Because the person that wants to become is kept alive by the desire to become. These people remain seekers for life, not realising that they are Life.
3. Awakening
A handful of seekers experience Awakening. The realisation that what they think they are, emerges only when thought appears. In the ab sence of thought, this person with a past and a future disappears. Yet life goes on.
This realisation is sudden for some, and for oth ers, a gradual progression. This leads to another significant realisation. Life is happening by it self. Thought created the belief that there was a person living his life. He was making decisions. He was performing actions.
This leads to the realisation that no separate person ex ists. Only Life exists. This Life has two dimensions: one keeps changing all the time and the other watches the change. Life seems to be dancing on the stage of Ex istence and also sitting as a silent observer, the audience.
This realisation silences the mind. The false identity can no longer hide in thoughts. When the false is seen as false, the True appears. The nature of truth is Silence. Some people call it Aware
ness. Others Emptiness. But words are meaningless. They dissolve in Silence.
Life no longer has any pur pose, meaning, or hope. All these are seen as projections of thought. They kept the ‘character’ alive. No one is living life now. Life is living itself. It is seeing itself with out the filter of thoughts. Without the lens of duality. Only it exists.
Life is its own authority. It
expresses its fullness in dif ferent ways. Without the chains of conditioning, it is naturally expressive. It is creative, sensitive, and intu itive, without the need to be any of it. All happens natu rally and spontaneously.
Awakening does not dissolve the mind. There are still thoughts of being a person with a story. But the mind has lost its power. In Awak
ening, thoughts are seen for what they are—a software that creates the illusion of being a person. There are fewer thoughts and greater Silence.
Awakening knows that the journey is not over. It also knows that there is no one there to undertake the re
maining journey. The prac tice is no longer of making an effort. There is Surrender. Whatever happens is a mat ter of Grace. It always was. Awakening realises it
4. Realisation
Realisation brings Absolute Silence. Realised humans
are either worshipped or crucified. No matter what the world does to them, it does not affect them. There is no identification with the form that the formless has taken. The form will live its destiny. The Formless is nev er born. It can never die.
Realisation speaks more through Presence than words. It has no will of its own. Whatever happens, happens as Thy Will. The drop of water has realised it is the Ocean. Everything that happens in the Ocean is an expression of the Ocean.
We are all on this journey, whether we realise it or not. It is a journey in time towards the timeless. It is a journey where we are already at the end of it even before we start. A dream character’s journey happens in the dream. When Awakening happens and Re alisation dawns, it was just a dream. A dream of the Self on a journey to realise the Self.
Ajay Kalra is a teacher of Advaita Vedanta. He endeavours to simplify the understanding, practice and application of the Philosophy of Oneness through his online classes, workshops, writing and videos. We welcome your comments and suggestions on this article.
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