By Suma Varughese
A recent insight opened up the domain of abundance for Suma Varughese
Suma Varughese is Editor-in-Chief of Life Positive. Write to her at email@example.com
Even though I have aspired to reposing on the cushion of abundance, I must confess that it is a state of mind that has this far eluded me. Chronically insecure in every area of my life, I have been stingy with the way I employed my time, energy, and most of all, money. I shied away from taking on too many commitments, or from spending money not just on others but even on myself, my family, or my house.
Of late, however, I have been working actively on freeing myself of this constriction. And recently, I happened upon an insight which I believe is the heart of the matter. My mother had been with my sister for the last couple of months while I gave my house a much-needed renovation. While there she became severely ill and came down also with a skin ailment that made looking after her much more difficult. To add to my woes, my mother’s regular caregiver also quit.
I set off recently to bring back my mother to my sparkling new home, along with a brand new caregiver. Once we began the time-consuming rituals of cleaning her, the new maid caved in and confessed that she would not come from the next day. That was one of my lowest moments. I too had found the work very difficult and I wondered how I would cope if we could not get a caregiver. Deeply troubled, I went to bed. The next morning I woke up, more stout of heart.
I asked myself one question. Did I have enough energy to take care of my mother for that day? I found I did. The sponging and dressing of her sores are the hardest to do and with the help of my regular maid, I got through it without too much difficulty – indeed with ease.
I had stumbled upon the precious secret behind living abundantly! All I needed was enough energy for one day. I did not have to worry about the morrow for the morrow was not my domain.
|All I needed was enough energy for one day. I did not have to worry about the morrow for the morrow was not my domain. It was God’s.|
It was God’s. Anything could happen, so why worry? This was an amazing revelation. For what was true of energy was true of everything else too – money, time, love, and so on.
If I have enough to get by for today, then I have plenty. I realised that it was the human tendency to fastforward to the future that loops us into anxiety and insecurity. How could we cease to feel crushed if we insisted on having enough of everything for the rest of our lives?
I thought back on Christ’s sage words in the Bible, ‘Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.’ We did not have to magnify our problems by projecting into the future. Its present dimensions were enough.
It is this capacity to rest in the moment that gives many of the poorest a sense of abundance that enables them to share their little with stray dogs and cats, never fearing or holding back for the next day.
When we were growing up in Bangalore, my parents, with six daughters and a limited income, never had much money, but that never stopped them from being abundance-conscious. I remember that church members would drop in for a meal and a bed, because my mother, they said, was the only one who would give them a smiling reception.
This insight is finally dissipating my insecurity and chronic tendency to worry. It may, I sense, actually permit me to stop playing safe and begin taking a few more risks. Abundance? That’s my middle name.
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